Things I Should Throw Out: Uncensored, 1968

by Derrick Bostrom

It's kind of annoying when you discover something in your collection that you forgot you own. It makes you wonder what else you've forgetten. What will I do when I'm too old and feeble to fight my way through all this junk? Will I need to hire some nice young person to fill the boxes one quarter full for me? Or perhaps I should begin breeding some helpers before it's too late.

I'm particularly annoyed because I was actually trying to find something else. Whatever; it appears to be lost. So I'll post scans from an exploitation magazine I didn't know I had instead. I have no idea where this magazine came from, but it's damn funny. It's also coverless, but you can visit the fabulous Bad Mags site for an example of their cover design.

Magazines like Uncensored will always hold a special place in my heart. They served as my childhood introduction to such things as hippies, homosexuality, drug abuse and celebrity debauchery. In this way, they played a vital role in the development of my understanding of the world we live in.

These excerpts are outrageous enough on their own; they need no smirking commentary to nudge them into the realm of irony. The reader will either find tasteless expressions of masculine insecurity and xenophobia entertaining or the reader won't.